Sun Media's Jim Slotek, in trying to be all contrary and actually defend Piranha 3D as a horror movie, describes Steven R. McQueen as "tow-headed".
"Tow-headed" means light blonde hair, dumbass, as in "When I was growing up in Knoxville I was such a tow-headed little cracker." McQueen's got dark hair. The daughter was tow-headed, sure. The younger son, ehh, borderline - he was more dirty, sandy blonde. Jake? Not even close.
UPDATE: Slotek apologized in an email. On behalf of all the tow-headed and formerly tow-headed peoples of the earth, I accept.